It's ALL About Relationship

I just returned from my 25th year reunion from East Stroudsburg High School (PA).  It's so hard to believe this much time has gone by, and I'm QUITE sure that when we were graduating, those having their 25th were much older.  (haha!!)

Obviously such a monumental occasion causes one to reflect on years past, childhood memories, laughter, challenges, and many wonderful people.  It was great to see old (not "OLD", just old as in "former") classmates, band friends, teammates, my two homeroom buddies whom I sat between from 7th grade on, kids I rode the bus with, kids I went to elementary school with....a friend since 2nd grade, a friend since 1st grade, a friend since 3 years old. 

Thinking back to the days when we were actually in school together (back when the worst thing that happened in a school day was someone putting a smoke bomb in the toilet or smoking in the bathroom) - we spoke about being friends forever.  We talked often about being friends for a lifetime.  What an AWESOME feeling to stand at Rudy's Tavern Friday evening and Shawnee Inn Saturday evening as one by one hugs were given out with great smiles followed by, "OH MY GOSH........it can't be 25 years, so good to see you!"......friendships renewed that had never lessened, never diminished and certainly had not faded.  It was childhood all over again, and it was FUN!!  It was fun back then, and it was fun this past weekend. 

Relationships really were intended to be for a lifetime.  Time and distance have no bearing on the heart - and years of absence can be made up in a split second in real relationships.  I, for one, will always enjoy being reunited with a friend....and am grateful to have them in so many places all over the globe. 

All of my life I have enjoyed real relationships.....the kind that don't need high maintenance.  The kind that can go years without anything more than a thought.....and then can come back together having grown even in the absence.  The kind that look for the best, see nothing but the good and push the other to greatness, while accepting them right where they are.  The kind in which there is freedom, there is depth, there is no pretense, and no expectation to be something they are not. 

As I consider how this relates to Ignite, I remember our May 2008 trip to Nicaragua when Rachel Harding said to me, "It doesn't matter who you are with....you make them feel like they are the center of your world."  That flashed through my mind as I stood in Rudy's and my friend Rob (since 7 years old) said, "You've always had a different character.....",  as my friend Monica said, "You're changing lives and making a difference...", as various others commented that "what you do" is inspiring.

Changing lives doesn't require a program or a speech.  It doesn't even require that one ever even talk specifically about it........it does require living it....and it does require relationship.  Relationship is what touches the heart and precipitates change in the life of another. 

For me, my life, and this great vision called Ignite International.....it's ALL about relationship!!

The Roar of the Lion

I am fascinated by lions.  They truly are king in the animal world, and being in their presence is, in its own way, a majestic experience.  In South Africa (2006), we visited a lion refuge - where lions that had been abused or mistreated were brought and taken care of for the rest of their lives. It was quite an experience standing on the other side of a very flimsy looking electric fense, within 20 feet of such a beast.  I was struck with their strength......their power.....and the overall sense that I had just being in his presence.  HE is in control, I am not. 

Lucky for the lions, there is a chicken farm next door, so every afternoon the truck pulls up and they toss the chickens (not live) to them, and the big cats chomp down their meal.  Standing as close as we were, I could hear each crunch loud and clear.  I cringed as I thought about the Christians of the first century.

Several years before, I remember having watched a show on Animal Planet or National Geographic about lions and how they hunt.  The narrator had explained that the lion prowls in his hunt....and when he had identified his target, he continues to prowl or to stalk.  He waits.  Patiently he stalks....and he prowls....and he stalks....and he waits.  And in an instant, when he has determined the right moment, after having positioned himself perfectly, he pounces.  At that moment of attack, he has already guaranteed his victory in his preparation.  He has already identified the right victim - the one that is weak or separated from the group, the one that has wandered, the one that he knows he will defeat.  He has already observed any escape route and has awaited the right moment when none is available.  And he pounces with such force, that when he gets his victim within his grasp, there no chance whatsoever for his victim to escape.  Destruction is sure, and it's all over but the crunching.  The lion wins his prey, and the death of his victim is guaranteed.

I Peter 5:8 tells us that our enemy prowls around like a lion, seeking whom he may devour.  He stalks.  He figures out our weaknesses.  He studies.  He observes.  He prowls.  And when he has identified the right moment, he pounces with great force.

The difference is this.  I Peter 5:8 actually says that our enemy prowls around like a ROARING lion, and many sources have confirmed that the roar of a lion can be heard up to 5 miles away by humans.  That tells me that he cannot possibly get close enough to me to destroy me, must less even attack me.......unless I completely ignore the sounds of his coming.  His stealth is announced.  His prowl is loud.  His stalking is not secret.  

See the signs, hear the roar, be honest enough with yourself to decisively choose to resist.....and stand against the one that would be out to kill, steal and destroy you.  It's our own fault if we allow him close enough to actually attack. 

The difference is this

Planting Seeds, Believing For Fruit

In 2004, I befriended an athlete in the country where we had taken a team.  She liked my Salon Selectives shampoo, so I gave it to her. (God can use ANYTHING to draw people to Himself!!) We have grown in friendship for 6 years, have talked by phone, IM and in person many, many times and at a deep level. She  has heard the Salvation message countless times – has always been very receptive, but I waited for the day she would finally make the decision to fully and completely surrender to Christ. Hours and hours of conversation, a great friendship and six years later, while translating for another ministry's team that had nothing to do with Ignite – she gave her life to the Lord!! Way to go, God!!!

As this crosses my mind often, and I celebrate this, it really makes me think about something.  How many ministries come home to report the numbers of people that "they led to the Lord".  While that is wonderful, and it gets people fired up.....do we ever stop to consider that all we did was pick the fruit of the tree and that more often than not their decision was the result of a seed sown one (or many), watered by another, fertilized by another, and we happened to be in the right place at the right time to pick the fruit.  How can we then come back and report on what "we" did.  God, save us from ever getting wrapped up in numbers and let us always be ONLY about the people, about the relationships...and to do our part to point them to You.  You alone will ever get the glory for decisions made as a result of our Ignite Groups.  We will not be a numbers-focused body.

 When we really understand sowing, growing and reaping, it totally takes the pressure off of us to have to “press” people to make a decision or to come back and give reports of how many thousands of people “we got saved”. The reality is…..it does not matter who gets the “credit”!!! If WE lead someone to Christ, there’s probably a bunch of folks who have been sharing for a long time. If we don’t…if all we do is attract them to be open to the possibility that there is a God who loves them, then so be it. Someone else will come along and pick the fruit. Who cares…..who really cares which role we play?! If they receive Christ and they enter Eternity in Heaven….THAT’s our objective!!!. SOW THE SEEDS….those who are ready to be a harvest will be it…..and sow, water and fertilize the rest. In HIS timing and in HIS way, they will receive. I LOVE how He works, and I love that it’s not up to us to MAKE IT HAPPEN…it’s up to us to BE HIM and to LOVE PEOPLE!!

YOU Are Why I Do What I Do

Funny how we are created for specific times, places, events and people.  Ten years ago, I was in the midst of a major life transition.  My years as a collegiate coach had come to a conclusion and I was in transition to take over a high school program - something I had not envisioned myself ever doing, and much less at a small, Christian school.  No interest whatsoever.  But I know that voice inside, and there was no doubt He had said it was right.  I had just come from 4 incredible years of a young coach's dream - coaching in the Big West Conference, home to 3 of the nation's perennial Top 10 women's volleyball teams, scouting and strategizing against several legendary coaches, and tasting the sweetness of the "big-time".  And it was time to step in obedience to take over a program that was clearly the opposite end of the spectrum.

Five years later, I walked away, having built them into a championship program, to fully engage into Ignite International as teams were requesting trips in August.  One of the hardest days of my life as a coach was to tell Nina Harrison that I would not coach her senior year.  I adore that kid, now friend!! 

Hard to believe they're all graduated (or close) from university studies now.  Val is starting med school.  She and Liz are both engaged to great guys.  Vanessa is impacting lives of younger girls and doing fabulous.  Victoria is progressing in her dream to break into Hollywood.  Kaci gets married in 2 weeks.  Kaleigh continues to be one of my favorite people ever to have worn a uniform of a team I had the honor to coach.  And the list goes on.  Leah is going to be a regular on ESPN one day - just wait!! Angela is happily married to a great guy!!  Faith continues to exemplify her name and is still about the most diligent person I have ever known - i still highly respect her for many reasons. 

SO proud of each of you - and for those I didn't name.....you are amazing as well, so just forgive and look at the clock (it's 2:36 a.m. right now!!).

But today is a special one for all of us as, whether present or not, we will celebrate with Lacey and her family as Lacey and Seth exchange their vows and become husband and wife.  There is only one Lacey McCabe on this planet, and I for one am incredibly thankful to have her and her entire family as part of my life.  I have told Lacey for 9 years now - "when you walk in the room, I feel convicted....like I should just love Jesus more."  What a testimony - to have that impact on someone who is "supposed" to be the one impacting you.  I have ministered with Lacey 3 times in Nicaragua, and I look forward to both her and Seth being connected to Ignite International for the long-term. 

By no means putting anyone on a pedestal, but this gal is the real deal.......Lacey, you amaze everyone around you with your voice, but all the more with the Spirit that resides deep within you.  Your purity is to be honored, and your joy is to be celebrated.  I thank God for the incredible privilege of being one of those whom God has used to speak into your life.  You have touched mine equally.....and I, as your coach.....and as your friend....congratulate you and your precious man, Seth, today.

To see each of the girls, now young women, above as they grow.....to see their commitments to the Lord remain without compromise.....to see them become what we envisioned "back in the day".....to see the favor of their Creator all over them......to be closer now than we were then, although none of us could have imagined that possible.......as a coach, THIS is the highest honor.  THIS is what it's about. 

To see you ladies today - living for HIM and loving it.....YOU are why I do what I do. 

Thank-you for making me love it all over again with every time you cross my mind - there is NO way to honor each of you the way you deserve.!!!

Faith, Angela, Kaleigh, Liz, Vanessa (my trophy), Victoria, Valerie, Lacey, Nina, Kaci, Leah......and the rest of you from that amazing group......never forget where you've come from........and through time and distance may you always beat with one heart, a heart after God!! 

I love you, All!!
JF